Why Vybz Kartel will never get signed by an American label !!

I love Dance Hall music, the beats are amazing and you can't help but dance. The best beats to grind to are (in my opinion) Dance Hall beats. This is probably one of the reasons why I always wondered why I get to hear so few of these killer songs on the radio. That is, I had no idea until I started to decipher the language.

You know what I mean, you love the music but have no idea what the person signing is saying, apart from some semblance of what might be the chorus. This was me with Dance Hall, especially my all time favourite song by Sean Paul, Deport Them.

This was me until I decided I needed to brush-up on my language skills, and stop signing "la la la la dutty la la la dutty boy" (I kid you not) instead of the real lyrics. Listening to Deport Them for purely the lyrics was my first taste of how crazy-sexual Dance Hall music is, and how toned down it is for an American audience.

This goes into my highly held opinion that Americans (and yes us Canadians as well) are a little shy when it comes to sexual content, no matter how crazy our own sex lives might be or how much we want them to be. So today's post is no less than a call-out to all those closet sexaholics: be no longer afraid of your body and what it can (and can't do), but enjoy that which it is doing (hopefully on a daily basis lol). As an ode to this post I give you a taste of Dance Hall (I do not agree with the homophobic ideas circling around in the industry), purely I aim to open your eyes (and legs) to the sex.

Below I present to you my most recent dive into Dance Hall lyrics. A relatively new song, but one that I giggle at whenever I get to the "satellite dish" part. In case you want to listen to it I also include the video.



Just so you get the awesomness of this song....below are the lyrics. So yes yes Kartel (or whomever I happen to like at the moment...spin me around like a satellite dish :)


[Intro:]
[Kartel:] Ah di techer
[Spice:] And ah spice
[Kartel:] Every man grab a gyal
[Spice:] And every gyal grab a man
[Kartel:] Man to man, gyal to gyal dats wrong
[Spice:] Scorn dem
[Kartel:] All wen a nite yuh pussy feel like sun hot; wen yuh come inna mi ramping shop
[Spice:] Mek sure yuh kno how fi wuk and ah nuh chat yah ah chat

[Verse 1:]
Hey, mi cocky longa than mi nine
Tell mi wah yuh like
Yuh wah mi try or yuh wah fi ride it like a bike
Well, yuh haffi ram it hard
Di cocky nuh fi lie
Damage it fi spite
Not becah mi pussy tight
Suppose mi put it pon di lef
Gyal yuh tek it pan di right
Mi nipple dem a ripe
Sen it up inna mi tripe
Wah titi appetite
Every nipple get a bite
Mi man haffi go see it
Mi and him haffi go fight

[Hook:]
Cah me haffi wine pon di cocky like dis
Kartel spin me like a satellite dish
Deal wid yuh breast like mi crushing irish
Spice I neva love a pussy like dis
You ah my mista
You ah my miss
Kill me wid di cocky
Kill me wid di tightness
And when you a come
Whispa someting like dis
I can't stop fucking you

[Chorus:]
Hey, cocky nuh play
Me will bruk yuh back
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will quint it up two time and pop yuh cock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will mek yuh run out a mi house
Inna half ah frock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
A gyal eva ride pon it and gi yuh heart attack
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop

[Verse 2:]
Spice ah you mi love
Yuh kno how fi do yuh stuff
Yuh pussy buff
Plus it squeeze like handcuff
Kartel ah you mi love
See it deh mi cock it up fi yuh ramp ruff
Til mi belly cramp up
Shhh di climax begun
Bear sweat a run
Hold mi tight spice
Me feel like me ah cum
Mi nah let yuh go
So don't let me down
Me two phone a ring and me nah ansa none

[Hook:]
Cah me haffi wine pon di cocky like dis
Kartel spin me like a satellite dish
Deal wid yuh breast like mi crushing irish
Spice I neva love a pussy like dis
You ah my mista
You ah my miss
Kill me wid di cocky
Kill me wid di tightness
And when you a come
Whispa someting like dis
I can't stop fucking you

[Chorus:]
Hey, cocky nuh play
Me will bruk yuh back
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will quint it up two time and pop yuh cock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will mek yuh run out a mi house
Inna half ah frock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
A gyal eva ride pon it and gi yuh heart attack
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop

[Bridge:]
[Kartel:] Ah di techer
[Spice:] And ah spice
[Kartel:] Every man grab a gyal
[Spice:] And every gyal grab a man
[Kartel:] Man to man, gyal to gyal dats wrong
[Spice:] Scorn dem
[Kartel:] All wen a nite yuh pussy feel like sun hot; wen yuh come inna mi ramping shop
[Spice:] Mek sure yuh kno how fi wuk and ah chat yah ah chat


[Chorus:]
Cocky nuh play
Me will bruk yuh back
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will quint it up two time and pop yuh cock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
Me will mek yuh run out a mi house
Inna half ah frock
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
A gyal eva ride pon it and gi yuh heart attack
When yuh come inna mi ramping shop
From http://www.6lyrics.com